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I’ve been wined and dined by alpha jock types, I’ve done the light studio sessions will fellow artists. You have seemingly NO sense of how a good man acts. So to properly address how to avoid this unseemly predicament in the future, it doesn’t start with spying on phone calls or snooping through drawers.Hey, I’ve even done the really effeminate straight hair dresser (He had the nerve to ask me to reassure his lady that we had been using protection when we hadn’t.) And yet I am still the back up girlfriend. You probably wouldn’t recognize a man of character if he opened your car door. It comes with looking for patterns in your past, since you’re the only common denominator in your life and you’ve CHOSEN these men.Regardless of our gender, relationship pain resulting in trust issues can happen to the best of us.

And before you say you’re not making yourself available to the right guys, I dated against type.

If you are a person who has cheated on someone and still believes you love that person, you’re about to have your ass handed to you. I’ve always valued my independence and ability to do what I want, but I also enjoy having someone to cuddle and go to dinner with.

When I bring up this subject in my social circle, it quickly dissolves into a heated debate. During my bizarre and dreadfully muddled dating history, I’ve been the gluttonous harpy who must have her cake and eat it too. On top of all of this, I’m pretty transparent about my habits and the insatiability that stems from my deep-seated FOMO.

"My first husband cheated on me with a childhood friend," says Diane* from New York City.

"His family was close to her family, so they never lost touch." Intimacy expert Mary Jo Rapini explains, "A lot of women think that all cheating women are floozies—not true.

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